I’ve ignored this site for well over a year now. In fact, about 7 months ago, my registration lapsed, someone else bought it and I didn’t even know.
That’s how long it had been.
What has hindered me from posting again? Well, clarity. Or a lack thereof. Back when Please Feed The Animals was the “blog for the recently unemployed advertising professional,” it was singular and focused. The mission was to help people in the ad industry get back on their feet once they lost their jobs. But then advertising started hiring people back. My career evolved. And what to do with PFTA got lost in the shuffle.
If I step back from the idea of blogging specifically for ad folks, and really, about making a film for and about them, the whole point for me is really about discovery. It’s about uncovering who you are once you turn off the ego and the fear-driven (but very real) self chatter about money, and seeing what’s left. It isn’t just a matter of saying, “I’m going to turn off my ego brain now!” It takes constant questioning and evaluating, trial and error, experimentation and failure. It takes living with uncertainty and the nearly perpetual ability to self-forgive.
Last week, I gained some clarity in a brief but important email exchange with my friend C.C. Chapman. He said to me, “I have to believe in my heart that I can use my powers for good AND provide for my family.” And that is what it all comes down to for me. Being creative. Operating from my soul instead of sheerly from my ego. All while providing guidance and food and education and a comfortable home for my children.
I’m not saying I have the direction for Please Feed The Animals completely crystalized just yet. Clearly, from the lack of a logo or design or any kind of positioning statement, I’m still a ways away. But what feels right right now are some occasional ramblings about being a provider while living and working authentically.
Who knows where it will go. But again, I begin.